Engaged? 5 questions to think about

3 min read

So, I woke up the next day a fiancee! The first thing I did was look at my engagement ring, and daydream about my future wedding, the dress, the venue, flowers, the perfect day. My new husband to-be took me away to a hotel in York for the night, and the conversation was already focused on the big day. We had so much fun discussing our ideas and thoughts about our big day; here are the vital early questions Soonly-Wed couples need to be asking each other:

engaged couple

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

1. Do we want a religious service or civil ceremony?

Most important part of the day! It’s so vital that you as a couple decide this before talking to loved ones to ensure that you are in agreement what you want and can be united.

2. What is our budget going to be?

Traditionally, fathers of the bride paid for the wedding of their daughters. However this isn’t necessarily the case now, decide as a couple what your budget will be, family may want to help out but don’t expect or rely on it.

3. Do we want to get married in the local area or not?

When talking about this one, think about the guests you want to attend and whether they can travel or not, especially if there is a cost element for them. Of course, the day is about you two but you need to ensure that the people you would like to enjoy your big day can be there.

4. What time of year would we prefer?

This depicts your style, flower, colour, outfits, nearly everything about your big day. For me, being a redhead, I didn’t want to get married in summer and look all lobster red and blotchy. Working in a school too, meant I wanted to think about time off and chance to go on a honeymoon. If you have a favourite flower, check when it’s in bloom, a favourite colour, think about whether it complements the season.

5. Who do we want to be there?

It might surprise you but the guest list was the very first thing we did. The reason being, it influenced our budget, our style, the where and when and plus it was fun! However it isn’t without its challenges – keep calm, listen to each other and compromise.

Amongst the excitement, questioning and daydreaming, I had a bit of a panic, a small wobble of overwhelming feelings. The only reason I’m saying this, is to reassure brides and grooms out there that it is completely normal to have a sudden feeling of panic. It is so easy to be swept up in adrenaline and excitement to suddenly have a down moment or two. The secret to getting through those times is to talk to your other half, explain how you’re feeling, and never keep it bottled up. Or, if your partner comes to you with a case of the cold feet, don’t panic, listen, be understanding, reassure that together you will find a solution and don’t be scared to change plans to support the other one’s feelings

The time you spend leading up to your wedding is just as significant as the actual day, you may disagree, you might even argue, but what is key- don’t lose sight of what is important. You and your partner wanting to declare your love and promising to be together forever- not who’s going to sit on the front row during the ceremony!

Jen Green

Jen Green

Game of Thrones mega fan, a massive bookworm and co-founder of SoonlyWeds. Married at a young age so I enjoy advising other couples and sharing my experiences.